Friday, April 12, 2024

Claw By Jack Younger

 

Claw
By Jack Younger
1976 Manor Books
Paperback, 219 pages

 


                Forget all of those one-star reviews you see online… this book is great! It’s cats killing humans, eating them alive. What’s not to love?

 

                Taking place in Marblehead, Massachusetts (just a hop skip and a jump from where I now sit), the coastal community is racking up a slew of hideous deaths. It is quickly discovered that the cause of these mutilations is… cats! Nobody is safe. Your cat, the one that sits next to you as you read this review? Lethal… it will eat you. Eventually, a small group of survivors hole themselves up in a restaurant, hoping that help will be forthcoming. Too bad a violent storm has shut down all power and washed out the bridge into town.

 

                Yeah, this is dumb as shit but it’s also a ton of fun. “A kitten stepped forward playfully to paw a hideous thing that had once been part of a man’s head.” “The furry mass engulfed him.” There were dozens of lines I had to read aloud to my wife, my own dumb cat lying next to me all the time. I laughed out loud a lot. Manor Books rarely disappoint. Part of it is because they had the worst editors ever and typos and misspellings abound. Just part of the fun.

 

                Admittedly, the book slows down half way through, when the plight of Marblehead gets out to the mainland and cops, military and news people try to get in on the action. There’s also a long scene with two cops and an old man they find crawling in the storm that has absolutely nothing to do with the narrative. And, while in real life I would find cat slaughter abominable, it’s pretty funny in this book. Silliness abounds. And watch for the most ridiculous, unromantic dialog leading up to an inappropriate sex scene ever!

 

                Jack Younger is none other than the original Creepy editor Russ Jones. He wrote a handful of novels and comic stories under that name. His comic book background surely informed much of the action and gratuitous gore in this book. The over-the-top badness of this book makes me want to dig deeper into his horror novel work. He is also a very accomplished artist but there’s no word on whether or not he is responsible for the (minimalist) cover art for this book.

Friday, March 22, 2024

Came a Spider By Edward Levy

 

Came a Spider
By Edward Levy
1978 Berkley
Paperback, 232 pages

 


Genetically altered, huge, hungry black spiders overrun Los Angeles. I know, we’ve heard all this before but this lesser-known spiders-attack book has plenty of new ideas to offer and is written in a breathless style that kept the pages a-turnin’.

 

Starting off with a young boy getting bitten by a voracious spider in the desert, it never really lets up. Oh yeah, kids buy the farm in this one. In fact, little Lee, the victim, was now an incubator. These spiders lay eggs in their human victims or just completely devour them. “A thick, black, hairy carpet…” is a pretty nice way to describe the onslaught of arachnid atrocities.

 

In addition to the spider juggernaut, Levy gives us some pretty good characters. The police lieutenant in charge is a very relatable guy for me… a bit overweight, getting a bit old and tired. This is not what he needed. There is also a touched upon, but never fully explored, nerd romance between the scientist in charge of finding a solution and one of the scientists responsible for creating the new strain.

 

Real science is out the window here… this new species reproduces super-fast and are ready to eat up LA at the drop of a coin. They eat up the zoo, and there is a wildly entertaining attack on a movie theater. Fuck The Blob… these guys mean business. Containing them proves to be a real problem.

 

Yeah, like I said; nothing brand new here but a very entertaining take on the Spiders Attack genre. It’s as good as a Richard Lewis spider novel and better than much of the swill I read and enjoy. Levy has a few other novels that I’m interested in reading, including The Beast Within which was adapted by Tom Holland for a film for MGM in 1982.

Friday, March 8, 2024

Blood Flies By Gene Lazuta



Blood Flies
By Gene Lazuta
1990 Charter/ Diamond
Paperback, 265 pages

    
                                              

                I just finished this book and I have absolutely no idea what I just read. Never have I slogged through a more confusing book.

                OK… here’s the gist. Pete Blackwell is summoned to Sharthington, Ohio in a dream. His grandfather had basically built the town and discovered an old Indian legend living beneath Black Island. Oh, and there’s a tower on the island. Anyhoo, Pete’s grandad experimented with this legendary life-form, mixing the DNA with other animals, creating new, weird animals.

                The Blood Flies? They’re described in many different ways, but mainly like toads with wings. They secrete a poison that Kyrik, the bad guy-sheriff, milks to sell and do his own nasty experiments. The flies themselves aren’t even mentioned after the half-way point. Kyrik doesn’t last much longer. The last third of the book is the old Indian legend taking over.

                Or something.

                Now, the story did hold a kernel of interest in it for me, but Lazuta overwrites to the point of parody at times. Conversely, some elements are glossed over so I had no idea what he was “talking” about. The story has an epic scope but seems only partially told. An early 10 pages of exposition told by a drunken sot sets it up, but it still never became clear for me.

Overwriting and senseless prose; a case in point, talking about a girl that Kyrik was holding captive for vivisection (yeah, I know…):

                “She wore a pair of dark trousers, with cuffs— Kyrik always liked cuffs, Pete didn’t think, he just knew, somehow, without thinking, he wasn’t thinking, he just… was— and her shirt was pink.”

                I shit you not. I didn’t change a thing.

                At the end of Part 2, the story pretty much seemed like it should end, but no… there were 100 more pages of word soup to go. Other than some cool mutated animals in the beginning of the section, the third part drags on and on and on. I had to power through to finish it. No fucking clue what went on. Cool cover, though.

                Sorry, Gene. I won’t be looking for your other books.




Sunday, March 3, 2024

Croc Attack By Brian Gatto



Croc Attack

By Brian Gatto
2022 Raven Tale Publishing
Paperback, 188 pages

 


                When I see there’s a book called Croc Attack, you bet your sweet ass I want to read it. The author mentioned it on the Books of Horror Facebook page, putting it on my radar, and since it is reasonably priced, I grabbed a copy.

 

                A group of twenty-something conservationists head into the Everglades to tag some animals, take some samples and, in general, do science stuff. This rubs some of the locals the wrong way (damn tree-huggers) but even worse is the thirty-seven-foot Crocodile that has started to make itself known. The book does exactly what it promises; there are loads of Croc attacks as well as inappropriate sex. Gatto is obviously a fan of 80s pulp horror and knows what is required for a book of this type.

 

                The characters don’t really matter; it’s a case of set ‘em up and knock ‘em down, which I am a fan of. To an almost comical point, all of the women are stone cold gorgeous, but if I can suspend disbelief for a 37-foot Croc, I have no trouble doing the same for every woman in the book who is a perfect 10 with a huge rack. No wonder everybody is so horny! People hook up left and right and some think about sex even as they are about to be chomped.

 

                The main storyline is similar to Numunwari (aka Killer Croc) by Grahame Webb and the film Dark Age (1987), which is loosely based on Webb’s book. Coincidentally, there is even a common surname of Darwin in both books. Croc Attack isn’t as gory as I wanted for the first two thirds of the book, with the Croc relying more on stealth, but towards the end, the kills get juicier.

 

                Like almost all self-published works, another pass at editing could have helped. There are a few sentences I would have reworked, and some word changes I would have done. (Yes, the mouth is cavernous, and the hide is scale-laden, but both terms were used too often.) Also, ecosystem, not echo system. These quibbles don’t put me off, they just bug the editor in me.

 

                I admit that I got a bit confused near the end when the action is told from a few different perspectives. Still, I will keep an eye out for this young writer. He has a good sense of humor on display and seems to have his teeth in the right place.

Wednesday, February 21, 2024

Bugged! By Donald F. Glut

 

Bugged!
By Donald F. Glut
1974 Manor Books
Paperback, 192 pages

 


                To me, Don Glut has always been a true Renaissance Man. Filmmaker, actor, screenwriter, director, musician, and dinosaur expert. It is his comic book writing that first made his name familiar in my life. He wrote for Warren’s seminal horror mags in the early Seventies (Creepy, Eerie, and Vampirella) as well and countless stories for Gold Key, including creating Dr. Spektor and Tragg, two familiar titles in my house when I was growing up. I was excited to finally catch up with this pulpy horror novel from back in the day, written concurrently with much of his comic work that I’m most familiar with.

 

                Members of a college fraternity show up for their 20-year reunion. The meeting place is one member’s home, deep in the swamp. What could possibly go wrong? Well, first off, one by one, the members get devoured by various insects. Could the member they called “Bugs” be behind the nefarious deed? And if so, just how is he accomplishing this sordid feat?

 

                Glut’s comic book sensibility is on full display here and it works well, pushing along the quick pace of the book. The characters aren’t deep and Glut sets ‘em up and knocks ‘em down. You have a mad scientist, his hulking henchman and plenty of victims that deserve their fate. The short novel plays like an old mystery more than anything; it would have fit well into Popular Library’s Frankenstein Horror Series. But never fear… Glut ladles on huge dollops of gore to keep things from reading too antiquated.

 

                Bugged! Is back in print now in both paperback and as an audiobook. It’s a fun way to spend some time relaxing with an old fashioned, good ol’ pulp horror book. It will fit nicely in between the Glut-penned Star Wars novelizations on your bookshelf. Yes- he is a true Renaissance Man.

 

Manor actually gives the cover illustration a credit. It is by Robert Owens. Thank you, Manor.

Tuesday, February 20, 2024

‘Gator By George Ford


‘Gator
By George Ford
1976 Award Books
Paperback, 170 pages

 


                Take a ragtag team of unmatched characters- criminals, moneymen, and a crooked cop, put them in a defunct, deserted motel deep in the Everglades and have them there to receive and then distribute 5 million dollars’ worth of cocaine. Add to the mix one 12-foot alligator who is wounded by one of the men and is very pissed off. What could possibly go wrong?

               

                I must admit that I had a ton of fun with this book. Every one of the characters in it is a complete moron except an innocent cocktail waitress who followed one of the palookas along for kicks. Bad decisions, idiotic moves and really dumb choices abound. Once the big boss and the cocaine arrives, there are almost Rube Goldberg-esque chains of bad events that occur.

 

                The wounded ‘gator doesn’t get as much ink as one might like in this type of story, but he is actually well-written and the only truly sympathetic character in the book. The slimy, buggy swamp is a character unto itself, as well. Except for a Water Moccasin eating a fly on the first page, the reptile science is all pretty cogent, and Ford paints the atmosphere on in thick strokes.

 

                Justin Marriott’s Pulp Horror #8 suggests that George Ford is a one-off nom-de-plume for Paul Fulford. I can’t find any more books under either name that look like they’d be of any interest to me, unfortunately, because this one is a great deal of fun, and I would love to read more like it. Ford/ Fulford must have read a lot of comic books and delivered at least one super-fun paperback.

Sunday, February 18, 2024

Satan’s Snowdrop By Guy N. Smith

Satan’s Snowdrop
By Guy N. Smith
1980 Pocket Books
Paperback, 256 pages   
                              
                    
                                                                                    Polish edition, Phantom Press 1991

                My love of Guy N. Smith is well known. As an addict of nature-strikes-back novels, many of his books are near and dear to my heart. Some of his non-animal books can be hit or miss with me but he always weaves an interesting story. Satan’s Snowdrop is an excellent book by anyone’s standard and there aren’t even any killer crabs in it. It is a hard-core haunted house tale.

 

                A rich American dude buys a picturesque Swiss mansion that had been the stomping ground of a Nazi torturer. Within the walls walk not only the tortured souls of the victims but the very evil that made all of the shit go down. Even moving the house, brick by brick, to America doesn’t quell the spirits. His family falls victim to the house and he finally sells it… to a new buyer who fares no better.

 

                The story is told in two parts, essentially from the viewpoint of two young boys who are forced to live there by their fathers, one after the other. Smith doesn’t blink when it comes to putting children in harm’s way and that is a welcome change from a lot of horror literature. Normally, I’m not into creepy kid novels but when the kids are innocents and the supernatural threatens them, I’m in.

                Satan’s Snowdrop is a haunted house book that works; there are many unnerving passages and Smith toys with the reader, setting up scenes that he knows will mess with you, and he succeeds. This sits in my top-5 of non-animal Guy N. Smith books. For now.